Chin Up....

Trying so hard to keep this chin up. I try so hard to just get through the day sometimes. I have so much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to. I don't know if it is just that maybe we are at the top of the pile. Maybe I am just not a patient person. Some days are better than the others. Some days just suck. I think if maybe I knew when we would get the call that would make a difference. I doubt it. I like to be in control and right now someone else holds our future. These few past few weeks have really been hard for some reason. Not so sure why, but I feel like my heart is really going to break sometimes. Lord knows I have Elias to keep me busy and he makes me full. This dream has just been in the works for almost 2 years now and no news. I keep saying, well maybe we will know who she is by the time we do this or that. And each time that event has past us by with no news of who our daughter is. Like I said, some days are great and I barely think about it. Other days are just not fun. I do look forward to going to bed though. I think about that phone call and that trip to China. I think about seeing Norah's face for the first time and the circle will finally be complete. What sweet sweet dreams....

I saw this on another adoption blog and thought it was cute... and true!!!!

YOU KNOW YOU ARE AN ADOPTIVE PARENT WHEN:
1. The fact that there are 143 million children without a parent to kiss them goodnight has made you lose sleep.
2. You realize DNA has nothing to do with love and family.
3. You can't watch Adoption Stories on TLC without sobbing.
4. The fact that, if 7% of Christians adopted 1 child there would be no orphans in the world, is convicting to you.
5. You spend free time surfing blogs about families who have experienced the blessing of adoption.
6. It drives you crazy when people ask you about adopted child's "real" parents.
7. You have ever been "pregnant" with your adoptive child longer than it takes an elephant to give birth.(2 years!)
8. You had no idea how you would afford to adopt but stepped out in faith anyway, knowing where God calls you He will provide.
9. You have ever taken an airplane ride half-way around the world with a child you just met.
10. You believe God's heart is for adoption.
11. You realize that welcoming a child into your heart and family is one of the most important legacies you could ever leave on this earth.
12. You know what the word "Dossier" means, and you can actually pronounce it!
13. You have welcomed a social worker into the most private parts of your life.
14. You shudder when people say your child is so lucky that you adopted them, knowing full well you are the blessed one to have him or her in your life.
~Author Unknown~

My Anam Cara...

There is someone that has been in my life for going on 20 years now. She has been with me through thick and thin. A pregnancy and the moment they told me I would never have anymore. The first person I told when we would be adopting from China. My biggest cheerleader and my crying shoulder. I love her more than air, mexican food, Starbucks Caramel Fraps, long tubbies, and mom's sweet tea. I am so blessed. Blessed to have her in my life. Blessed to have grown up with her and given the chance to grow old with her. The first time I met her I didn't like her. She was wearing a two piece bathing suit at church camp and at 14 there was so much to be jealous of not to mention the insecurites. We learned about the birds and bees from the camp counselor and we have been inseperable ever since. She has been the biggest support for bringing Norah home and wants her here as badly as we do. I could never imagine me without her and her without me. I love her boys like they are my own flesh and blood. I love her husband like a brother. We all grew up together. She mails things to Norah just to help me keep this dream alive and have some peace in my heart. I could never repay... I am forever indebt.
My Anam Cara.... My Soul Friend...

This is a message that I got a few days ago. Now you can see why she is simply incredible and a joy to my heart:

you are my other half.
you're the one that gets it (and by "it" i mean me)
my steady in marriages, births, and loss.
through hell and highwater, you've walked with me.
you're my touchstone, emma.
you're a miss america smile when i need it.
my music guru.
the only person i am not offended by when i am scooped.
you're my "give these to my mother" when i want a laugh.
you remind me to love myself, and i love you for that.
you're "aunt penny" to my babies.
you're the one i'd walk the earth for (but since my thighs rub together, i'll just fly to china. :)
the happiest part of my childhood
the best friend i could ever ask for now
and the prettiest old hand i'll hold when we're old

you're one of the best parts of me. you're my anam cara.

Head In the Sand

This is what I want to do until we get the phone call. This wait has been excrusiating to say the least. When we got our call back in November I had NO IDEA that it would be another 5 months until we heard something. I don't think that the new list is here and I doubt that it will be here this week. What I do know is I am tired of getting all worked up about it and no sign. Our agency updates their webiste on Wednesdays. We were all geared up for some big news and nothing. They aren't even finished with this last list! So I just want to stick my head in the sand until my phone rings. Unfortunately I can't do that. I try to stay busy, try to stay away from the computer as much as I can..., but it is hard! People are ALWAYS asking me when will we get the call. I love that people ask because that means that they care. But I hate the fact that I say, "Anyday now we will get the call..." Am I really saying that because I mean it or am I saying that to make myself feel better?? Not so sure anymore. I just hope that she is home before Christmas. That would be really cool, but I am not getting my hopes up about it. Not anymore. Ugh. I know one day it will happen though. One day. That is what I have to hide in my heart.

Hurry....

I really feel like I am going to loose it :) I am slightly obsessed with this stinkin computer and I am constantly checking the agency and the boards. I need to get a life. But I just feel like she is so close sometimes and I can't get to her. Ugh. This wait is agonizing... hurry up Norah!!!!

Latest News...

Not a whole lot going on at the casa. Yesterday was Shannon's birthday. His mom, sister and our nieces and nephew came down to celebrate. We had some family over Saturday night for some yummy cake and icecream... It was yummy. But the greatest part of the whole weekend was the cookie cake. My sister-in-law Liz and I went to Sam's and bought this ginormous cookie cake. But it wasn't just a cookie cake it was a DOUBLE DOOZIE cookie cake! I mean delicous! It was a slice of heaven in my mouth!!!!!!!! So we had some family over Saturday night and I got alot of great pictures. I will post more on wednesday when I am off again.
On the adoption front, all is well! I emailed our agency this week to update our medical check list and in the reply email that I got back she siad that we were on the top of the list and we should hear something soon! It is so hard to belive that we could be seeing Norah's face anyday now. I have a feeling that they will get the list the 2nd week of March and we could hear something the beginning of April... I really hope sooner! The Flowertown Festival is the first week of April and I would really like to do some shopping :) I am really good at that! Anway, I do hope that we get some news soon... I really want to see her face...
And the news of the week.... Elias can ride his bike with no training wheels! When my neices were here this weekend, they were playing in the front yard and being the mom that I am, I open the door to yell at him to get on the sidewalk. I gues I really didn't look at him because my niece Zoey said, "Aunt Penny, Elias is riding his bike with no training wheels!!!!!!" I almost took a stroke! I am so proud of him! He just took off! What a big boy! I love that kid so much! He is the apple of my eye! He is going to be such a great big brother!

Peace and Love to All!