What Mother's Day means to me...

For those of you that have heard this story before please catch up after the photo... :)

I had a dream one night about 8 months after Shannon and I were married. Shannon worked night shift at the time so I was of course, home alone. I dreamed that I was in the hospital. I wasn't sick, I was having a baby. I walked out of my hospital room and down a very familiar hallway. I then walked into a room and sat down in a wooden rocking chair. And just like that, I was holding a baby. Not just any baby, but my baby. He was in a diaper and a t-shirt. The tiniest diaper and t-shirt I had ever seen. Where his bellybutton was, there was blood on his little shirt. I looked down and into this little angel's eyes. His dark brown hair and brown eyes just captured my heart. I cannot explain the feeling... He looked at me and just as plain as day said to me, "Don't worry momma, I will be home soon." And then I woke up. Alone. In bed and not in the hospital. Not a mother at all. Just alone with my thoughts. It was so real this dream. I sobbed and cried and cried thinking this was the worst joke imaginable. I drove to work that day in tears and remained that way for the majority of the day.
Just to clue you in, I wasn't "suppose" to have a baby. It wasn't in the cards for me to be a mother. But the Great Physician had other plans...
I took a test and it was positive. I was indeed pregnant. I was pregnant during that dream and had no idea. Oh my, and how those brown eyes and brown hair can put the best bandaid over this broken heart. He sure did :) May 14th 2002, after 2 days of labor I held this tiny little one. Just like I had in my dreams. He is Mother's Day to me.



Fast forward 5 years. Half way around the world. In a place where we didn't know the language, no familiar faces, no familiar way of life. In a hotel in Nanchang,China, this little precious gift was handed to me kicking and screaming, just as Elias had come out. She too saw no familiar faces and could not understand the language. But she was handed to me just the same. And I was a mother again. We made it. We are a family. Was there ever a time that she was not here? My little "Bella"....



My children are miracles. Both very much prayed for and both very much loved and wanted. Both of them came to me after I spent much time on my knees praying asking God just one more time. One more time to be that mother that I wanted and needed to be. I hope one day they realize how much they mean to me. And how much I really love being their momma. Nothing in this world makes me happier and there is no better place then when they are in my arms. They are my miracles. My angels that walk this world with hidden wings.



And Mother's Day would not be complete without my mom. My steady and my rock. Thank you for all that you do and for all that you have done. I hope I'm as good as you one day. And I hope my kids feel about me the way I feel about you. My love, Minnie XOXO
Momma, this one is for you :) I love you! Happy Mother's Day!!! XOXOXO